Okay, I'm going to try to write this post in as kind and tactful a manner as possible. Strangers: don't touch my kids! Don't tickle their feet, don't pinch their cheeks, don't grab for my infant's hands!!!! Well-meaning-Grandmas-who-are-in-no-way-related-to-me-or-my-children - THIS MEANS YOU!
Ummm, okay, so much for kindness and tact. In all seriousness, however, this is becoming increasingly irritating on my daytime trips to the grocery store or Target. Let's face it, the people who are shopping at these institutions in the middle of the day are moms and retired folks. Now, I realize that we are supposed to act in a Christian manner toward our bothers and sisters in Christ. This is a tough act to balance while also trying to teach your children stanger safety.
I don't mean to sound like a crab, and maybe I am just having one of "those" mommy days, but I'm getting tired of the following two comments: "Are they all yours?" and "You must be busy!". Yes and yes, people. Yes, I have four adorable, well behaved children who are close in age and I know that when I take them all somewhere with me, we are quite a darling sight to behold. This is not, however, an open invitation for people to come up and touch them in some manner. Add into this scenario the very real threat that their food allergies pose and going out has become rather stressful. Imagine if grandma-we-don't-know has just finished some peanut-butter crackers and she touches my child before I can stop her. The rest of our day will be spent in the emergency room!
There are some days when I just need to get in and get out of wherever we are. I do not necessarily have time or the inclination to tell a stanger all of my children's names and ages! This simply makes me uncomfortable. I am generally a pretty friendly person. I like to be around people and I consider myself to be fairly kind and generous. I would hope that those who know me would agree. I also feel a stong need to keep my children safe from all the creeps out there. Because you can't tell a "bad apple" from the outside, I need to be a good example to my kids in regards to stranger safety.
Okay, this post is more of a rant, and I realize that it is more negative than positive, which is not my intent on this blog. I just really needed to vent about feeling like people don't respect your privacy if you have a large family. Maybe the age of reality TV has entitled people to think that if you match a profile, your business is their business. So, thanks moms for giving me space to vent today!
Lord, give me space to breathe so that I may better prepare my kids for the world at large. Help me to balance an awareness of the evil that does prowl our world, with a kindness toward others. Grant me and my family the gift of discernment to be able to see the good and evil in the world around us and the humility to respond appropriately. Thank you Lord, for my family. Please hold us in the palm of your hand. Amen.
Monday, August 24, 2009
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
New Mom Mysteries
A friend of mine, who is a new mom, feels like us veteran moms let her down a little. She is barely three months postpartum and is going through those crazy hormonal swings that we all have experienced. She says that we didn't tell her. She asked me to blog about all the things veteran moms don't tell their friends who are preggers with baby number one. I agreed, but I do contest: We told her, she just didn't believe us. (Or, our brains blocked out some of the particularly challenging moments and we honestly did forget. Most likely, a little of both.)
This friend, let's call her "Erica", is baffled by her body, saying things like "The baby is out, why should my hormones not be back to normal!", and gems like "I didn't think it would take SO LONG to feel like myself again." I know, I know, try to keep reading through your laughter induced tears as you remember how sleepless and haggard you were when your first born was 11 weeks old.
So, pregnant and new moms, this list is for you. If you are squeamish, skip to #8!
1. Childbirth hurts - no matter how many hippy-dippy names you give a contraction, it still hurts
2. You will bleed after delivery. For a long time. (Erica was shocked at this little truth!)
3. Stitches in your nether regions are not pleasant.
4. You will be so agog over your new little creature that you will not really care about 1-3.
5. The high wears off and you will be more tired than you have ever been in your life.
6. You will be tempted to lie to your husband after your six week checkup and tell him that you were not given the all clear.
7. When you give you husband the all clear, sex will not be the same. (But it will get better!)
8. Your body will continue to bear the telltale signs of having borne a child - stretch marks and a pooch, long after you give birth. It is nine months for your body to gestate, it is at least nine months before your body will be "fully recovered".
9. "Normal" will never be, what "normal" was before you had a baby.
10. You will never look at the world the same way once you meet your baby face to face. Every news story involving a child will evoke in you a deep compassion and empathy like you have never been capable of before.
The biggest truth about having a child, and the most difficult to explain, is this: as much as you love your husband, parents and friends, there is NO love like a mother feels for her child. It literally takes my breath away. God has surely made our capacity for love greater because we are mothers. There would be no way that a mere human could feel the depths of this maternal love without divine grace.
"Erica", I hope that I have done well by you and all the other new or pregnant moms out there! Moms, post your comments about what surprised you most about pregnancy and becoming a mom!
Lord, Thank you for the blessing of my children. Please help me each day to be the mother you desire me to be for them. Give me the grace to replace impatience with patience, frustration with kindness and gentleness, and exhaustion with energy. Send your Holy Spirit to dwell in our home and in our hearts. Amen. Mary, Holy Mother, pray for us.
This friend, let's call her "Erica", is baffled by her body, saying things like "The baby is out, why should my hormones not be back to normal!", and gems like "I didn't think it would take SO LONG to feel like myself again." I know, I know, try to keep reading through your laughter induced tears as you remember how sleepless and haggard you were when your first born was 11 weeks old.
So, pregnant and new moms, this list is for you. If you are squeamish, skip to #8!
1. Childbirth hurts - no matter how many hippy-dippy names you give a contraction, it still hurts
2. You will bleed after delivery. For a long time. (Erica was shocked at this little truth!)
3. Stitches in your nether regions are not pleasant.
4. You will be so agog over your new little creature that you will not really care about 1-3.
5. The high wears off and you will be more tired than you have ever been in your life.
6. You will be tempted to lie to your husband after your six week checkup and tell him that you were not given the all clear.
7. When you give you husband the all clear, sex will not be the same. (But it will get better!)
8. Your body will continue to bear the telltale signs of having borne a child - stretch marks and a pooch, long after you give birth. It is nine months for your body to gestate, it is at least nine months before your body will be "fully recovered".
9. "Normal" will never be, what "normal" was before you had a baby.
10. You will never look at the world the same way once you meet your baby face to face. Every news story involving a child will evoke in you a deep compassion and empathy like you have never been capable of before.
The biggest truth about having a child, and the most difficult to explain, is this: as much as you love your husband, parents and friends, there is NO love like a mother feels for her child. It literally takes my breath away. God has surely made our capacity for love greater because we are mothers. There would be no way that a mere human could feel the depths of this maternal love without divine grace.
"Erica", I hope that I have done well by you and all the other new or pregnant moms out there! Moms, post your comments about what surprised you most about pregnancy and becoming a mom!
Lord, Thank you for the blessing of my children. Please help me each day to be the mother you desire me to be for them. Give me the grace to replace impatience with patience, frustration with kindness and gentleness, and exhaustion with energy. Send your Holy Spirit to dwell in our home and in our hearts. Amen. Mary, Holy Mother, pray for us.
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